As a 62-yr-old, self-described old school, conservative (classic liberal) feminist, thank you for the work you do as we fight forces that want to drag us back about 500 years. I believe most young women today have no comprehension of the daily conditions for women just 50-60 years ago. I remember the fight for Title IX and female sports, hysteria and hate spewed over the thought that girls and women would have athletic outlets. As a young teen I was in awe of the female dental tech talking about jogging and inspiring me. I was slow as a rock but I enjoyed the feeling of freedom and didn't care about the stares. We've come a long way. Almost every natural inclination and ability I have is in traditionally hands-on male fields of endeavor and I've had to fight every inch of the way. I've had support and mentoring from some men along the way and I've also had to deal with those who felt entitled to try and block me from living my life as I see fit. I can remember growing up and constantly being asked why I hated being a girl. This included men and women who would likely have been considered conservative at the time. It seems now they've all transferred over to the left. I don't receive hatred from conservatives that those on the left spew towards women these days. I've used labels but we need to stop obsessing over labels and find our common ground. There are two enemies in this fight; misogynistic men and what I call the trans-handmaidens. These handmaidens have always had males on a pedestal, and they are carrying out a scorched earth war against the women who don't go along with the program. These women (Sturgeon) are always about centering the needs of the worst men, but I have my own scorched earth tactics and I'm not backing down. I'm heartened by you, JK Rowling and every other man and woman standing up to stand these Orwellian mobs down.
I've been subscribing to your column for several months, Kara, and I thank you very much for this article. I also thank you for finally allowing comments, because I believe there needs to be room to have in-depth discussions about this. And I am especially grateful for you opening up comments for this particular article, because this is a topic that's extremely worthy of a discussion--in fact I would argue that a serious discussion about "where have all the feminists been?" needs to happen before the gender identity movement can be tackled head-on.
Before I begin, I want to make it clear that I am indeed a man (as if that wasn't already obvious). I do not consider myself to be a particularly right-leaning man--I was born and raised in a strong Democrat household, the son of two public school teachers who both got an opportunity to go to college thanks to welfare--and I consider myself to be essentially in the same space, in terms of political view, as I was then. By today's standards I would probably be considered "right-leaning" by others, but I consider myself more of an independent than anything. I have never been registered to any political party and have voted for both Rs and Ds since 2000, the first year I was eligible to vote. I am a church-goer and come from a small town in southern Illinois. My friends are almost all members of the working-class; outside of my writing career (fiction writer, nothing political), I am a part-time janitor. I don't particularly consider myself a feminist--in fact I'm not even sure what that word is supposed to mean. I don't know what others would say about me. I'd like to think the women who know me would say good things about me, but you'd have to ask them,. So those are my credentials.
Here is my first reaction:
I'm sorry, but as much as I agree with and appreciate what you said here, the fact of the matter is that this issue IS being pushed by the left, it has ALWAYS been pushed by the left, and feminists have ALWAYS voted for the left--and to this day I see no indication that that is going to change. By voting for the political movement that has for fifty years been in favor of enabling, enforcing, and now enshrining this ideology into law (admittedly, though, most actual people voting for the left, including myself on the multiple occasions when I have done so, have not realized it), you have been complicit in this from the beginning. There is NO getting around this. Feminists have been directly responsible for the gender identity movement because of their refusal not to vote left. The left is where this is coming from, so every time a feminist votes left, she is enabling the gender identity movement to continue, whether she realizes it or not, or whether she thinks there's a higher priority at stake (chiefly abortion) or not.
Even as a recent example, here in the US we had a chance, nationally, to make a statement about this issue just a few months ago, but we chose not to take it. It appears as though feminists prioritized abortion instead. It seems likely that "gender identity" will become a defining issue in the 2024 election, but I see no reason to expect that feminists at large are not going to vote for the Democratic candidate again. I'm sorry, but until you* stop voting for the same politicians who are going along with this movement (which I don't believe you're going to do), your complaints about being ignored are simply invalid. You are, and have been, directly contributing to the problem. This movement wouldn't have gotten as far as it has without your direct help.
*I'm using the plural "you" in this sentence, and in the following paragraphs. I'm not singling out Kara in particular (although I do include her in that plural "you"), but to all left-leaning, "progressive" women to whom this applies (and there are a lot of them).
The left is where moral relativism comes from, it's where the "my truth" movement (which basically posits that anyone's strongly held beliefs or opinions are basically "truth" to that person, regardless of whether or not these opinions and beliefs are actually true) comes from, and it's where the desire to remake society comes from. Gender identity is coming basically exclusively from the political left. There may be a touch of right-wing capitalism thrown in for good measure, but that's a fairly minor component compared to the ideological capture of left-leaning institutions--and if the left had never sought to push gender identity onto society, there would be no big-business for right-wing capitalists to capitalize on. Yet despite this, feminists continue to self-identity with, and vote for, the left. Why? Why do you do this? Is abortion really that important? Weirdly enough, abortion rights might not even matter that much in the future, as we raise a generation of sterile young people who will never reproduce. Is that really the battle worth fighting right now?
Another way in which you are directly implicated in the rise of gender ideology is your decades-long demonization of the right. I've been watching some of these "Let Women Speak" videos on Youtube, and I'm struck by how the women hosts respond to being called "hateful" and "bigoted" by the TRAs. I do sympathize with them, but at the same time I can't help wondering how many times these same women have called men, particularly right-leaning men, "hateful" and "bigoted"; I'm willing to bet that it has happened, and probably more than a few times. Now they know what it feels like. It's not a nice feeling, is it?
The Democratic party has been able to take your support for granted for so long that it has no interest in listening to you, because they are absolutely confident that you will return to the fold and "vote blue no matter who" when it counts. And so far, they've been right. Meanwhile, you've spent so long demonizing the Republican party that they don't know what to do with you, and don't know how to communicate with you. Sure, I understand why feminists on the left are annoyed by the likes of Matt Walsh trying to "muscle in" on their territory. I'm not a hardcore traditionalist (although I probably am more of a traditional than a leftist feminist would be), so guys like Matt Walsh tend to bug me in general. But "TERFs" continue to identify with and vote for the left. Matt Walsh naturally sees you as enemies because he has, in fact, been your enemy. Somehow or another, this bridge is going to have to be crossed.
(I would have plenty to say to the Matt Walsh-types, too, but this isn't Matt Walsh's substack, and I doubt the sorts of readers who subscribe to Kara's subscribe are big Matt Walsh fans, so I don't think this is the place for that).
At this point, I don't think it's very likely that you're ever going to reform the Democratic party from within, at least not until after the party has suffered heavy losses and become convinced this is a losing issue. They are not at that point yet, and won't be for at least a few more years. To get their attention, you're going to have to lead an exodus of women from the Democratic party. Maybe you don't identify as Republicans--that's okay. I don't, either. I think the "team spirit" political party system we have is stupid, exhausting, and ultimately counter-effective for actually getting anything done. But as long as you continue to identify as a Democrat, and vote for Democrats, you are not going to change the Democrats. Period. End of story. It is not going to happen, especially now that Trump and DeSantis are speaking out against GAC ("gender-affirming care"). This WILL cause the Democrats to reflexively, instinctively, automatically defend GAC and continue to insist on it, guaranteed. That IS going to happen. We have seen this pattern play out enough over the last decade to be absolutely confident of this. If Trump (and now DeSantis) takes a stance on something, the left will feel duty-bound to take the exact opposite stance, just to prove him wrong. There is no way the Democratic party will back down from GAC for at least the next two years.
If you want to get the attention of the Democratic party, and their allies in the mainstream media, then you have to leave it, and get other women to leave it, too. THAT will get their attention. These "work to reform from within" efforts are not working, and they are not going to start working anytime soon.
Kara herself may not read these comments, but any other commenters, feel free to respond, and do so in-depth. I think we need to have these conversations and hash these issues out with each other if we're going to be able to resist the avalanche of gender identity ideologies that are trying to sweep over our society.
My position is that those who "vote blue no matter who" (which includes the majority of self-proclaimed feminists) are actively responsible for the predicament we find ourselves in today, and no amount of wish-casting or saying, "Well, we were really against it all along!" is going to change that.
It's the left that's pushing this nonsense. Period. End of story. Continuing to vote for the left is only going to make the problem worse.
I'm sure you hate the right. I'm sure that conservative men like Matt Walsh have done and said things that absolutely infuriate you. But they are not pushing the trans ideology. This is not coming from them. This is coming from the left. Entirely, totally, wholly from the left. Voting for the left is only going to enable this movement to continue. At this point, and for the foreseeable future, you cannot vote for a leftist politician and NOT be voting in favor of more gender identity bills and dogma. To vote for one inherently also means voting for the other. They go hand-in-hand, and will for at least one more election cycle.
I don't consider myself partisan. I don't consider myself a Republican. Voting red is not important to me. Solving problems is what's important to me. I see the trans agenda as a problem that needs to be solved. And voting blue at this point is not going to solve that problem--it will only make it worse. That might change at some point in time. But that's the situation as it is right now.
Duane: may I suggest that you might consider stepping back a little and let the women speak? I happen to think that’s what’s most important, as it’s women’s voices, most of all, that have been silenced in this debate--and that is the case no matter where we usually land on the political spectrum. I am a solid Democrat and lean progressive, and my efforts have all been to hold the feet of my own party to the fire, repeatedly, along with doing what I can to educate my friends and neighbors to do the same. I am making progress, in my own small way. So, I say, let us each do what we can, from whatever vantage point. No need for pushing one strategy over another. It’s really simple, in the end: just center women, spare us the (forgive me) mansplaining lectures on how we each can do that, and we will win.
Do you really think this only affects you? I have seven nieces and nephews who are all in various stages of adolescence right now. I'm trying to help them and their parents navigate this crazy world that they've been forced to live in (by your party, I might add. Your party is responsible for this madness). You really don't think I have a stake in this? Or does my concern not matter because I'm a man? Is there anything I could say that you won't dismiss as mansplaining?
I have been "letting the women speak." I don't write Substack articles about this issue--I leave that to you. I don't make Twitter threads about it--I leave that to you. I don't post Youtube videos--I leave that to you. I do read the articles, the twitter threads you write; I watch the youtube videos. But in all this, I've noticed a significant element of acknowledgement of responsibility missing from much of this commentary. The reality is that, whether you want to admit it or not or take responsibility for it or not, this mess IS the fault of the left--and every time you continue to vote for the left, you continue to contribute to this problem. Some erstwhile left-leaning women have acknowledged this, but many continue to live in denial of their corporate responsibility for the "gender identify" phenomenon. Left-learning women are so accustomed to blaming right-leaning men for all their problems, but this mass hysteria did not happen because of right-leaning men--it happened because of left-leaning women. And until that is acknowledged and remedied, the problem can't be solved.
We saw an example of this play out in front of all of our eyes in real-time in the last three years with COVID. "Science" could not defeat COVID because "science" created COVID to begin with. The scientific community could not and cannot get its credibility back without first acknowledging its responsibility in creating the problem to begin with. It hasn't done that yet, and the longer it puts off doing it, and the more it tries to avoid reckoning with that responsibility, the worse the consequences will be. This goes for many other branches of government and human institutions that were also complicit in making the COVID hysteria worse than it needed to be.
That's just how the world works. That's how human society functions. And from my perspective I'm not seeing the left-leaning feminists who were largely responsible for creating the conditions in which this debacle could take place acknowledge that, and I truly don't believe they're going to be able to solve the problem until they acknowledge their role in making it. Call it a corporate confession, if you will. Confession comes before repentance, and repentance comes before reconciliation. There is no way around it.
Duane: everyone has a stake in this, of course. But what I would counsel is that blaming any particular individual or group isn’t productive, and blaming women is particularly counterproductive. All of us are here in the trenches battling over this in our own ways. This is not a partisan issue, and there is no single prescriptive solution. It affects us all, and all of us need to pull together to right the ship, each in the way that makes most sense to us. I hope we can have agreement on that. But, if not, we shall each perseverance in our own ways, of that I have no doubt.
I almost stopped reading when Duane blamed feminists for all this. Real feminists (sorry, but I am a real feminist and am not trying to crow about it, it's just a fact) do not support what Duane seems to be claiming they do, they never did, including the brave and intelligent Kara Dansky. As heartfelt as his comment was trying to be, it revealed how little he really knows about feminism. It was an unintended insult to "left-leaning" women (and to some men), many of whom are leading the way in opposing the trans/queer/gender transition cult. And why does Duane focus on feminists as culprits, and not on so-called left-leaning men just as much? Does he realize that a lot of modern day young women who call themselves feminists are in essence just handmaidens of left-leaning men, and are not real feminists at all? Duane has so much to learn about what's really going on, because he actually seems pretty confused. I hope he makes an honest effort to do so. ....A last minute question: What does "right-wing" mean to a man like Duane? What does he think of the statement "The right thinks women [and I'll add children to that] are private property, while the left thinks women [and children] are public property"?
Cynthia, Kara has said she still identifies and votes as a Democrat. In some of her writings, Kara has also deflected blame for the rise of gender ideology away from the Left. That is what Duane is calling her out on. All that said, yes, Kara is speaking out very forcefully and impactfully in many respects. I appreciate the fact that she doesn't cede an inch to gender ideology, including pronoun usage. I feel like progress is being made, but tend to agree with Duane that substantive change won't happen until Democrats lose large numbers of voters and elections.
To all here: in this post, Kara has listed a number of wonderful things she and others, both as individuals and through organizations, have done to counter the scourge of gender ideology. One of the hopes I have from Kara opening up comments is for us all to be able to share what strategies any of us has used, in no matter how small a way, to join in this fight. It can be overwhelming, as the problem is so widespread and multi-faceted. I’ll put out a couple things I have tried, falteringly, but every now and then with a little success:
1) if I spot a concrete local issue, eg, right now there is a bill in my state assembly that would allow men to self-ID into women’s prisons, I write to the local official(s) to state my view. In this case, I got only acknowledgement of receipt from a staff person (v automated), but I have made a mental note to build on that as the occasion arises.
2) at least once each day that I spot something problematic (or good on the issue) in a news or opinion article, I write a comment to address it, and, if possible and appropriate, I write directly to the author of the article. It’s good to be aware that even online comments can make a difference: in some cases, the writer of the article actually reads them; in other cases, mere quantity can count. So, as one example, a young writer in a magazine to which I subscribe wrote a piece explaining why boycotting can be a good tool to bring about change. I know this to be true from working way back when for ACTWU v JP Stevens, but unfortunately, she chose a very bad example, which was boycotting the Harry Potter video games because, she claimed, Rowling is a transphobe filled with hate. I wrote to the editor in chief and explained (as politely as I could) that the problem here was Rowling isn’t in the least a transphobe, and recommended that the writer, and all of his staff, read Rowling’s own words on the subject. He did respond, and he wasn’t dismissive. It’s a small thing, but it’s a start, I do hope.
So, I don’t want to go on, but I hope some here might chime in with what you’ve tried, and how it went.
Susan - yes I totally love the fact that we can comment so that we can share strategies! Thank you for this! For myself, I have been so bottled up with frustration over all of this, that stumbling upon Kara’s substack is a godsend! I like your strategies and usually do the same. I think it’s very important that we speak out and not be afraid to speak our minds no matter how uncomfortable it can be. I also think that it is gathering together in different ways, whether through rallies or other types of gatherings that is essential. I have been thinking a lot about this and realize how effective this can be. Look at the stir that Rowling has brought about! The rage of all those women in Scotland brought about tremendous pushback! Being involved in a community like this and staying informed helps to keep us strong! I love some of the material that I have recently discovered on “Unherd” and “Quillette.”
Kara: first off, thank you so much for opening your Substack up to comments, and I hope all here will adhere to Kara’s guidelines to maintain constructive discussions. Second (really this is likely first), I am very, very grateful for your courageous advocacy.
I’d like to add, to Kara’s excellent list of those who have been speaking up so courageously, Lisa Selin Davis (who also has a Substack, and whose focus, as the mother of two affected girls, is what’s happening with young people). I have learned an enormous amount from her, including how to most effectively use my own small voice.
Finally, I want to encourage everyone here to speak up as you can, in ways that are comfortable for you, even in the smallest of ways. As the old mantra goes, “many hands make light work.” I have been amazed and surprised to discover how much little steps, with one person at a time, can add up to making a much bigger difference. If each of us just keeps chipping away in our own little corners of the world, collectively, we will get there, and we will win.
Thank you for this piece. It bears repeating, and this says what needs to be said.
Leftist radical feminist for 40 years here. I’ve lost friends over this and I have learned to be careful about talking about this so I don’t find my car or house or person being attacked in ways more harmful than just having my feelings hurt by people who drink the trans kool-aid.
WE ARE HERE.
We have been collecting news stories, creating databases, organizing, and we have been DOING THIS MOSTLY IN SECRET BECAUSE PEOPLE SILENCED US.
I had every single account (Twitter, Facebook, Medium, and many others) shut down because I hav e been an out and proud TERF for a decade, and know others who have been the radical feminists who educated me about this before I understood what was happening.
Now that the push back is being credited to the conservatives, a lot of us are cringing, not only at the “where are the feminists” but because it’s being flung about by people who historically despise us as much as the men who mock us by pretending to be us.
Where are we? We are there screaming and no one hears us. So, for the conservatives who spent a lifetime trying to push women back into the kitchen to do their husbands bidding, don’t ask me that or you will never hear the end of it.
Just because the world has no desire to hear us doesn’t mean we were not there risking our safety and well-being to defend our rights.
I guess our voices are too shrill and y’all just can’t hear us. Brand new day, same old drag.
Serious question: if "conservatives"--and particularly conservative men--had been willing to join in this fight with you, say, in 2015 or so, would you have accepted their help? Do you even accept it now?
Duane, we have discussed this for a long time. Many of us, maybe most of us, seem inclined to be grateful for conservatives showing up to slow this down and hopefully help stop it.
But you have to realize that it is hard to consider conservatives allies as they are themselves putting women and girls in harm’s way with their own religious agenda around other topics like abortion rights, which also very much deal with women being safe.
And of course the obvious gay rights platform as well, which is something all radical feminists support, and ironically we often supported gay rights when others did not, only to finally fully realize that gay men for the most part are either indifferent or actively dislike women and that things like drag and appropriating womanhood like it’s a tasteless joke is where all these people who scream about appropriation, blackface, and oppression seem to go deaf, dumb and blind.
So, while it is good that there is any group of people to show up and fight to stop this hideous, toxic, harmful runaway train, the fact that few conservatives seem to be acknowledging that it is radical feminists who HAVE been fighting, while losing jobs, businesses, and being shunned from their communities for it is just the same BS as it always was, people using OUR labor and the movement we already built to act like they are the ones doing the heavy lifting.
My friend, you are not the ones that have done the heavy lifting here.
I personally welcome you to stand against the medicalization and butchery of children and the removal of boundaries between women and the men who would harm us. But, please show some humility and realize that many of us are lesbians and we have a long history of having to fight like hell against conservatives just to be able to be openly who we are, and a lot of us are women like myself who have had to endure a lot of abusive, controlling behavior from conservatives who did not like women being in charge of themselves and their lives.
Also, be honest, are you taking up this fight because you want to stop the industry from reducing us all to commodifiable parts while simultaneously destroying women’s rights, or do you just have an axw to grind with “liberals” because they are telling you that you no longer have the right to indoctrinate your kids into your own toxic belief system, that is now their job?
Because radical feminists by and large despise gender roles. The whole pink and blue, dolls vs. trucks for toys, girls wear dresses and makeup and boys have short hair and pants, all that is just garbage. None of this is about God. It’s about preserving our humanity and stopping the machine from turning us into some life form they hold the patent on. Which also includes objectfying and sexualizing everyone for profit. The sex industry, something radical feminists also despise, has a huge hand in this trans ideology.
So tell me you also want to eradicate the porn industry and put in place the nordic model so only johns and pimps and traffickers are punished for selling sex, not the actual victims (those who get bought and sold) and maybe we find some solid common ground.
Or do you want women to remain as commodities but to get these queers out of power? Be honest. It matters to us.
First of all, I'm not a conservative. My question had nothing to do with religion or God.
Secondly, I'm "taking up this fight," so to speak, for A) my nieces and nephews, who are all in various phases of adolescence right now; B) because I recognize "gender dysphoria" (or however it's being called today) as a mental health issue, and as someone who was diagnosed with schizophrenia as a teenager and overcame that, I believe "affirmation" is the absolute worst thing that can be done to help someone suffering from such a problem; C) I do believe in certain "absolute truths" about the world, and the trans ideology is a lie, not truth.
Thirdly, you really assumed a lot about me from my asking you a simple question. Do you think I'm some sort of porn addict, or something? Why? Because I'm a man? If this is the way you treat someone who has a common interest with you, it's no wonder you're facing such an uphill battle. I've had problems even watching my niece get dressed up for her dancing, with all the stuff they put on and the outfits they wear. And these productions are almost entirely female-led.
At any rate, I can tell my presence isn't going to be welcome here, so I guess I'll leave.
Duane, no one assumed anything about you. You asked a question, and I answered from my perspective, which is based on having been a part of this fight for about a decade.
Do as you will, that is your choice.
You are welcome here, but if you cannot here a woman who happens to be a radical feminist speak truth, then just realize that this is at the heart of why this problem even exists. By and large men want to protect what they view as their own rights to have what they want while being unable to hear and understand why this often infringes on women’s rights.
No one accused you of being a porn addict, but your taking it there makes me think you have a problem with my pointing out that the porn industry is a huge part of this problem, and that the women/people who expose the connection between the “trans” movement and porn upset the people who want to tell themselves porn does no harm (but it totally does).
Trans ideology is a lie. We agree on that. And you should totally fight for the safety and well being of kids, whether or not they are related to you.
The bigger question is whether or not you or other people coming into this fight uphold the rights and boundaries of women? And why does it cause you such distress to have me point out what radical feminists are having to deal with as far as conservatives coming in to this fight, with us knowing they never supported women’s rights?
No one accused you of anything, my man. You came here with the question of whether or not you are welcome because you are a man I take it? And I responded that you are, but we are not entirely comfortable with people who show up late to this fight who may not support women’s rights. And you got angry. Which is what women are used to from men who don’t support our speaking openly about what is happening to us.
You personally stand to lose a lot less than any women or kids who are put at risk by “trans” ideologues (I say the word in quotes because it has no real definition or meaning). It may as well be labelled “mens sex based rights movement” because essentially that is what it is. Men lording their rights over women in all spaces and all contexts. A trans male will never be demanding anything from men and show on the other foot, if they did demand to be in men’s prisons or play on men’s sports teams they’d by and large get their asses handed to them. Cuz they are women.
No women are dressing as men and going out to hurt men. But the opposite is happening at an alarming rate and we are constantly gaslit by just everyone who supports the BS trans movement telling us that it never happens, even as we offer every instance of it happening as proof.
Women are the ones with a right to be furious, as we’ve been asking where people with common sense and a backbone are, and why everyone is avoiding truth in this. We are shocked, exhausted, and angry. And then we hear “where are the feminists!” What? You mean the people who were the ONLY ones fighting this and being shamed and fired and cancelled while everyone laughed about it or thought we were uptight bitches for not embracing men in makeup as women.
My saying this is not an indictment of YOU. It is an insight into what has been happening. And FYI, my response to your post was also a response to some others in general, asking where the feminists are. And there are conservatives following this movement now, and I want them to know that while I feel we all need to come together to stop this, I do grow concerned that many of them do not support women’s or gay rights.
I’ve long believed that if conservative, religious people show up to push back at this then women’s rifghts and gay rights get plowed under with it. It does not follow that I am labelling you as either of those things. As for being a porn addict, all I said is that this trans BS is heavily tied in with porn and feminists are anti porn because of how it affects us in a very real and harmful way. One pointed a finger at you. Why are you so defensive? It feels like you are looking for a fight.
I’m not. I’m saving my energy for the perverts in drag who are demanding to be called women.
Can you acknowledge the challenge of joining with "strange bedfellows" in fighting this issue? What does conservative mean to you, Duane, practically speaking, that is, in day to day life? What does real feminism mean and what has it meant, practically, that is, in day to day life? These are important and fundamental questions.
Can you acknowledge the challenge of joining with "strange bedfellows" that have spent decades demonizing you solely for your gender? I literally grew up being made fun of by "feminist" women because I'm a man. I was always assumed to have backwards views on everything. I had to sit through entire college courses where I was assured that I was basically the reason for all the world's problems.
I don't even consider myself a conservative (I don't consider myself a liberal, either). I honestly probably have more in common with you than I do with "conservative men." I don't hang out in conservative internet spaces, I don't watch conservative news, I don't follow conservative trends. I wanted to help build a bridge, but after one day it's clear that my presence isn't helping. I don't want to ruin Kara's comments section, so I'll leave.
(I do consider myself a solutions-oriented person, and the fact of the matter is, although this truth may make you uncomfortable, the Democrats ARE the political entity pushing the gender identity ideology, and they will continue to do so until they become convinced it's a losing issue. They are NOT convinced of that yet, and won't be until they see the result in election losses. I'm willing to bet that every "feminist" here has voted straight Democrat for all her adult life, so whether you want to admit it or not, you have enabled the rise of the trans movement. That may make you uncomfortable--good, it SHOULD make you uncomfortable. But it's the truth, whether it's a truth "feminists" want to accept or not.)
That's my message. Make of it what you will. I wish you well.
A resounding "No" or "I don't really believe you" to just about everything in your comment. So good bye to you too, though I can't say I'll miss you. Good luck in your struggles.
There is just so much good writing about gender ideology, if only you know where to look. I think one of the confounding things with many friends who balk when I try to discuss this with them is that they look to public and media figures they trust on other issues as guides to this one. It’s a very hard thing to let go of that and truly think for yourself; you really have to fight against your own priors, and I don’t underestimate how hard that can be. I have been there myself, and there still remain lines I just won’t cross.
Lisa Selin Davis noted this today, when reflecting on an interview she recently did: “We need to stop discounting information just because of where it appears. When it comes to what's happening in gender clinics, to what's happening to families who haven't been given full information, who've been told science is settled when it's not—we need to put politics aside.”
This occasioned recalling a good friend who balked at reading something by Davis herself, as it appeared in the New York Post, but did so because he trusted my judgment about Davis. He was amazed at how rational the piece was, then went on his own search to discover other things Davis has written, no matter where they had appeared. He has never turned back, and I am beyond grateful to have him as an ally. With other friends, unfortunately, I have as yet had no luck. One friend has particularly high regard for Jon Stewart, who is calamitously wrong on these issues. When I gently tried to point out how, she clammed up, and the subject has been off limits since (though I try to keep our lines of communication friendly while looking for another opening).
I’d be interested to hear how others have dealt with this kind of thing, as I am sure so many of you have.
Susan, our media constantly refers to the fact that the AMA, APA, and the endocrinology society (forgot its name) support the use of puberty blockers and cross sex hormones and the whole “gender affirming” ideology. The fact is that these organizations have been captured by gender ideologues and trans activists (WPATH) and are not represented by science or medicine. Most people are not aware of this. The media point to erroneous and outdated studies such as the Dutch protocol which is not at all relevant to the present day dysphoric youths. The statistic about trans youths and suicide is also completely erroneous, and, I believe, based on a self survey related to the Trevor Project. So much of this misinformation has been fed to the general public. Many people swallow all of this In it’s entirety. It’s always helpful to show people the actual statistics around all of this. There are so many excellent sources and one that comes to mind Is Genspect? Not sure if I have spelled that correctly.
Margot: thanks for weighing in. Yes, Genspect is an excellent resource. What I am finding is that there is a need for a “breakthrough moment/opportunity” with each friend or neighbor with whom I try to engage before they begin to be receptive to learning about even tiny bits of of the massive excellent information that is available. Some breakthrough moments that offered opportunities to give additional information have been:
1) an alert (courtesy Kara and WDI) of the proposed changes to Title IX regulations
2) older women who follow sport who admire and listen to Martina Navratilova
3) older people who have trouble with the ungrammatical use of “they” as a singular pronoun
4) a blog post my better half did that included footage of the out of control folks who disrupted the Let Women Speak event in Manhattan, NY, which I then shared around
5) most recently, the changes to the Dahl children’s books
After that opening, if I am exceedingly lucky, baby steps, parceled out, not too much at a time, can help further things along. And then, one day, sometimes, the light totally dawns, and it is a beautiful thing. No more delicate educating needed, and an ally is born.
Here’s an example of that--from a person to whom I just sent “Affirmation Generation”:
I was wondering why I was sitting at the computer watching 90 minutes on a subject that didn’t directly affect me, and then I realized if I were watching PBS (when it was showing important stuff) I would absolutely watch this to the end.
I also appreciated the irony that when watching YT hysterical arguments on trans subjects I wondered why, instead of getting upset, they couldn’t reason together calmly. Then while watching all the calm presentations here my reaction was GETTING UPSET.
A writer friend from the 90s told me her mother (in Canada) had undergone prefrontal lobotomy. The friend was still outraged by it, though I forgot exactly how the mother’s life had been forever changed, for the worse.
This WAS very effectively done. I kept thinking of Extraordinary Popular Delusions and the Madness of Crowds. Not to mention the lobotomy craze and the opiod craze.
This should be required viewing for anyone in a position to affect medical and social policy. And as a member of society OF COURSE it affects me, no man is an island etc.
For those who may not be familiar with the writings of Jo Bartosch, I recommend her work. This piece, “It’s not ‘far right’ to question Drag Queen Story Hour: Parents’ legitimate safeguarding concerns are being dismissed as fascistic,” is typical of her sharp-witted, rye commentary.
Here’s a quote: “In truth, the growth of drag events for children is an indictment of the mainstream. What possible good did Tate Britain think it was doing by hosting a Drag Queen Story Hour? And why are so many libraries and schools so keen to put on these trans-activist events for children? This has left an open, child-safeguarding-shaped hole for more extreme groups to step through.”
While Bartosch is writing in the UK about events there, I am sure many of us have seen this and things akin to it happen wherever we live. One little thing I do when I see cultural institutions of which I am a member kowtow to gender ideology/self ID is to write to them, or if sent a member survey, take on any questions that show gender ideology at work. (In a recent example, I objected to the Morgan Library putting on an Eddie Izzard “one woman show.”
I would be interested to hear from anyone here what, if anything, you try to do when encountering things like this.
Yes yes, Susan, I know what you mean about the "breakthrough moment." I also find that many women simply do not realize the totality of the problem, as they are busy living their lives, working, etc. For those of us who are really involved and informed, there is that realization. I do think the Title IX change possibility, if understood, is a huge wake up call. People have not been paying attention, and perhaps now they are. I find some of the Youtube info very helpful - there are several women who are speaking out about this and the long-term danger of transition.
I think, too, that since we live in the West, we are, of course, very open to civil and human rights, as we should be. This ideology has hijacked citizens' desire to be open to all lifestyles, etc. And of course most of us want people to live as their authentic selves. This also leaves open to these types of delusional ideologies, and many people are reluctant to speak up for fear of being accused of being some sort of "phobe."
As time goes on, this will eventually settle. Sadly, there will be so much human destruction in its path, with many, many young people irreparably harmed. We must persevere, and we will!
Thanks for mentioning "Extraordinary Popular Delusions." I was not familiar with that!
Thank you, Kara, for all that you are doing to combat this nonsensical, yet insidious, gender ideology. I have been following you since your first appearance on Hannity. I think it matters little which side of the political aisle one is on when it comes to all of this. Though I must confess that I do favor some of what Duane has said, we must pull ourselves together and stand up for what is not only right, but logical and real in every sense.
I have read a good deal about the history of this ridiculous ideology and have been following (quite obsessively), all news gender-related, including Riley Gaines’ fight for womens’ sports to Nicola Sturgeon’s merciful resignation!
I have always stood for womens’ rights but have not necessarily defined myself as a feminist so much as a “rugged individualist.” Now is the time, though, for strong women to step up and redefine ourselves. We must appeal to the young generation. We must bring back the legacy and truths of our mothers and grandmothers who, regardless of political persuasion, understood the meaning of womanhood. And I am very optimistic that this is happening.
I am disheartened, though, that this terrible conflict is so defined by politics - not at all surprised of course. We have come to be so wed to our left or right leaning persuasions that’s nothing else matters. This is why it’s such a HUGE big deal that Jamie Reed has blown the whistle on what’s happening in the Missouri gender clinic. I am sure that such things are happened everywhere that these clinics exist. The sad legacy, what I refer to as the “Lupron legacy” will surely leave a terrible blight on our time, one in which countless children, and adults too, will have been permanently harmed.
Finally, I want to say “spread the word!” All of us - men and women - will make good things happen and halt the march of gender ideology if we stay strong! And, I’m grateful for having discovered WoLF through Kara, an organization that I have recently started to contribute to.
Dear Ms Dansky: I'm hoping you can help me. I'm running for school board in my Minnesota town. I'm also a former lifelong Democrat because of their betrayal of women and girls, and I decided to run for school board to fight to get gender ideology out of our schools. One of the opposing candidates has denounced me for my "extrem views" and for having spoken "during public comment at the Feb., 2022 School board meeting, where [Iris - that's me] falsely accused our schools of indoctrinating students with gender ideology. She used inflammatory language like “high priests of the Church of Trans.” I want to state that I strongly disagree with these unfounded claims. I find this kind of negative rhetoric really harmful to our community, to our school community."
I have a radio interview tomorrow in which I'll respond to her. As you know, Minnesota is a "trans refuge" state, but I'm finding it difficult to glean bare-bones information about exactly HOW OLD a kid can be to get "gender affirming care" with or without parents' consent. The law says over 18, but there is a broad exception to this: "Minor who is living apart from parents and managing own financial affairs" and "emergency treatment" (if "gender-affirming care" is "life-saving treatment" it can surely be interpreted by the TRAliban MN state authorities to be "emergency treatment." I just want to be able to say straight in language that everyone understands what the facts are – can my 14-year-old get "gender-affirming care" (including surgery) without my consent? "
Thank you so much for all your hard work.
The Hill: "In April 2023, Walz signed a bill into law giving Minnesota courts the ability to make initial custody determinations in cases where “the presence of a child in [the] state is for the purpose of obtaining gender-affirming health care,” and temporary emergency jurisdiction in cases where a child present in the state “has been unable to obtain gender-affirming health care.” This so-called “gender-affirming care” can include puberty blockers, opposite-sex hormones and other interventions. So the effect of this law is that Minnesota courts have the power to remove children from their own parents’ custody if the parents (inside or outside of Minnesota) wish to protect their children from harmful hormones or surgeries."
As a 62-yr-old, self-described old school, conservative (classic liberal) feminist, thank you for the work you do as we fight forces that want to drag us back about 500 years. I believe most young women today have no comprehension of the daily conditions for women just 50-60 years ago. I remember the fight for Title IX and female sports, hysteria and hate spewed over the thought that girls and women would have athletic outlets. As a young teen I was in awe of the female dental tech talking about jogging and inspiring me. I was slow as a rock but I enjoyed the feeling of freedom and didn't care about the stares. We've come a long way. Almost every natural inclination and ability I have is in traditionally hands-on male fields of endeavor and I've had to fight every inch of the way. I've had support and mentoring from some men along the way and I've also had to deal with those who felt entitled to try and block me from living my life as I see fit. I can remember growing up and constantly being asked why I hated being a girl. This included men and women who would likely have been considered conservative at the time. It seems now they've all transferred over to the left. I don't receive hatred from conservatives that those on the left spew towards women these days. I've used labels but we need to stop obsessing over labels and find our common ground. There are two enemies in this fight; misogynistic men and what I call the trans-handmaidens. These handmaidens have always had males on a pedestal, and they are carrying out a scorched earth war against the women who don't go along with the program. These women (Sturgeon) are always about centering the needs of the worst men, but I have my own scorched earth tactics and I'm not backing down. I'm heartened by you, JK Rowling and every other man and woman standing up to stand these Orwellian mobs down.
I've been subscribing to your column for several months, Kara, and I thank you very much for this article. I also thank you for finally allowing comments, because I believe there needs to be room to have in-depth discussions about this. And I am especially grateful for you opening up comments for this particular article, because this is a topic that's extremely worthy of a discussion--in fact I would argue that a serious discussion about "where have all the feminists been?" needs to happen before the gender identity movement can be tackled head-on.
Before I begin, I want to make it clear that I am indeed a man (as if that wasn't already obvious). I do not consider myself to be a particularly right-leaning man--I was born and raised in a strong Democrat household, the son of two public school teachers who both got an opportunity to go to college thanks to welfare--and I consider myself to be essentially in the same space, in terms of political view, as I was then. By today's standards I would probably be considered "right-leaning" by others, but I consider myself more of an independent than anything. I have never been registered to any political party and have voted for both Rs and Ds since 2000, the first year I was eligible to vote. I am a church-goer and come from a small town in southern Illinois. My friends are almost all members of the working-class; outside of my writing career (fiction writer, nothing political), I am a part-time janitor. I don't particularly consider myself a feminist--in fact I'm not even sure what that word is supposed to mean. I don't know what others would say about me. I'd like to think the women who know me would say good things about me, but you'd have to ask them,. So those are my credentials.
Here is my first reaction:
I'm sorry, but as much as I agree with and appreciate what you said here, the fact of the matter is that this issue IS being pushed by the left, it has ALWAYS been pushed by the left, and feminists have ALWAYS voted for the left--and to this day I see no indication that that is going to change. By voting for the political movement that has for fifty years been in favor of enabling, enforcing, and now enshrining this ideology into law (admittedly, though, most actual people voting for the left, including myself on the multiple occasions when I have done so, have not realized it), you have been complicit in this from the beginning. There is NO getting around this. Feminists have been directly responsible for the gender identity movement because of their refusal not to vote left. The left is where this is coming from, so every time a feminist votes left, she is enabling the gender identity movement to continue, whether she realizes it or not, or whether she thinks there's a higher priority at stake (chiefly abortion) or not.
Even as a recent example, here in the US we had a chance, nationally, to make a statement about this issue just a few months ago, but we chose not to take it. It appears as though feminists prioritized abortion instead. It seems likely that "gender identity" will become a defining issue in the 2024 election, but I see no reason to expect that feminists at large are not going to vote for the Democratic candidate again. I'm sorry, but until you* stop voting for the same politicians who are going along with this movement (which I don't believe you're going to do), your complaints about being ignored are simply invalid. You are, and have been, directly contributing to the problem. This movement wouldn't have gotten as far as it has without your direct help.
*I'm using the plural "you" in this sentence, and in the following paragraphs. I'm not singling out Kara in particular (although I do include her in that plural "you"), but to all left-leaning, "progressive" women to whom this applies (and there are a lot of them).
The left is where moral relativism comes from, it's where the "my truth" movement (which basically posits that anyone's strongly held beliefs or opinions are basically "truth" to that person, regardless of whether or not these opinions and beliefs are actually true) comes from, and it's where the desire to remake society comes from. Gender identity is coming basically exclusively from the political left. There may be a touch of right-wing capitalism thrown in for good measure, but that's a fairly minor component compared to the ideological capture of left-leaning institutions--and if the left had never sought to push gender identity onto society, there would be no big-business for right-wing capitalists to capitalize on. Yet despite this, feminists continue to self-identity with, and vote for, the left. Why? Why do you do this? Is abortion really that important? Weirdly enough, abortion rights might not even matter that much in the future, as we raise a generation of sterile young people who will never reproduce. Is that really the battle worth fighting right now?
Another way in which you are directly implicated in the rise of gender ideology is your decades-long demonization of the right. I've been watching some of these "Let Women Speak" videos on Youtube, and I'm struck by how the women hosts respond to being called "hateful" and "bigoted" by the TRAs. I do sympathize with them, but at the same time I can't help wondering how many times these same women have called men, particularly right-leaning men, "hateful" and "bigoted"; I'm willing to bet that it has happened, and probably more than a few times. Now they know what it feels like. It's not a nice feeling, is it?
The Democratic party has been able to take your support for granted for so long that it has no interest in listening to you, because they are absolutely confident that you will return to the fold and "vote blue no matter who" when it counts. And so far, they've been right. Meanwhile, you've spent so long demonizing the Republican party that they don't know what to do with you, and don't know how to communicate with you. Sure, I understand why feminists on the left are annoyed by the likes of Matt Walsh trying to "muscle in" on their territory. I'm not a hardcore traditionalist (although I probably am more of a traditional than a leftist feminist would be), so guys like Matt Walsh tend to bug me in general. But "TERFs" continue to identify with and vote for the left. Matt Walsh naturally sees you as enemies because he has, in fact, been your enemy. Somehow or another, this bridge is going to have to be crossed.
(I would have plenty to say to the Matt Walsh-types, too, but this isn't Matt Walsh's substack, and I doubt the sorts of readers who subscribe to Kara's subscribe are big Matt Walsh fans, so I don't think this is the place for that).
At this point, I don't think it's very likely that you're ever going to reform the Democratic party from within, at least not until after the party has suffered heavy losses and become convinced this is a losing issue. They are not at that point yet, and won't be for at least a few more years. To get their attention, you're going to have to lead an exodus of women from the Democratic party. Maybe you don't identify as Republicans--that's okay. I don't, either. I think the "team spirit" political party system we have is stupid, exhausting, and ultimately counter-effective for actually getting anything done. But as long as you continue to identify as a Democrat, and vote for Democrats, you are not going to change the Democrats. Period. End of story. It is not going to happen, especially now that Trump and DeSantis are speaking out against GAC ("gender-affirming care"). This WILL cause the Democrats to reflexively, instinctively, automatically defend GAC and continue to insist on it, guaranteed. That IS going to happen. We have seen this pattern play out enough over the last decade to be absolutely confident of this. If Trump (and now DeSantis) takes a stance on something, the left will feel duty-bound to take the exact opposite stance, just to prove him wrong. There is no way the Democratic party will back down from GAC for at least the next two years.
If you want to get the attention of the Democratic party, and their allies in the mainstream media, then you have to leave it, and get other women to leave it, too. THAT will get their attention. These "work to reform from within" efforts are not working, and they are not going to start working anytime soon.
Kara herself may not read these comments, but any other commenters, feel free to respond, and do so in-depth. I think we need to have these conversations and hash these issues out with each other if we're going to be able to resist the avalanche of gender identity ideologies that are trying to sweep over our society.
If your position is that we can't solve this issue until we all vote red, then it's clear that voting red is more important to you than this issue is.
This issue crosses partisan lines, or it would if opportunistic partisans allowed it to.
My position is that those who "vote blue no matter who" (which includes the majority of self-proclaimed feminists) are actively responsible for the predicament we find ourselves in today, and no amount of wish-casting or saying, "Well, we were really against it all along!" is going to change that.
It's the left that's pushing this nonsense. Period. End of story. Continuing to vote for the left is only going to make the problem worse.
I'm sure you hate the right. I'm sure that conservative men like Matt Walsh have done and said things that absolutely infuriate you. But they are not pushing the trans ideology. This is not coming from them. This is coming from the left. Entirely, totally, wholly from the left. Voting for the left is only going to enable this movement to continue. At this point, and for the foreseeable future, you cannot vote for a leftist politician and NOT be voting in favor of more gender identity bills and dogma. To vote for one inherently also means voting for the other. They go hand-in-hand, and will for at least one more election cycle.
I don't consider myself partisan. I don't consider myself a Republican. Voting red is not important to me. Solving problems is what's important to me. I see the trans agenda as a problem that needs to be solved. And voting blue at this point is not going to solve that problem--it will only make it worse. That might change at some point in time. But that's the situation as it is right now.
Tl;dr
🙄
Duane: may I suggest that you might consider stepping back a little and let the women speak? I happen to think that’s what’s most important, as it’s women’s voices, most of all, that have been silenced in this debate--and that is the case no matter where we usually land on the political spectrum. I am a solid Democrat and lean progressive, and my efforts have all been to hold the feet of my own party to the fire, repeatedly, along with doing what I can to educate my friends and neighbors to do the same. I am making progress, in my own small way. So, I say, let us each do what we can, from whatever vantage point. No need for pushing one strategy over another. It’s really simple, in the end: just center women, spare us the (forgive me) mansplaining lectures on how we each can do that, and we will win.
Do you really think this only affects you? I have seven nieces and nephews who are all in various stages of adolescence right now. I'm trying to help them and their parents navigate this crazy world that they've been forced to live in (by your party, I might add. Your party is responsible for this madness). You really don't think I have a stake in this? Or does my concern not matter because I'm a man? Is there anything I could say that you won't dismiss as mansplaining?
I have been "letting the women speak." I don't write Substack articles about this issue--I leave that to you. I don't make Twitter threads about it--I leave that to you. I don't post Youtube videos--I leave that to you. I do read the articles, the twitter threads you write; I watch the youtube videos. But in all this, I've noticed a significant element of acknowledgement of responsibility missing from much of this commentary. The reality is that, whether you want to admit it or not or take responsibility for it or not, this mess IS the fault of the left--and every time you continue to vote for the left, you continue to contribute to this problem. Some erstwhile left-leaning women have acknowledged this, but many continue to live in denial of their corporate responsibility for the "gender identify" phenomenon. Left-learning women are so accustomed to blaming right-leaning men for all their problems, but this mass hysteria did not happen because of right-leaning men--it happened because of left-leaning women. And until that is acknowledged and remedied, the problem can't be solved.
We saw an example of this play out in front of all of our eyes in real-time in the last three years with COVID. "Science" could not defeat COVID because "science" created COVID to begin with. The scientific community could not and cannot get its credibility back without first acknowledging its responsibility in creating the problem to begin with. It hasn't done that yet, and the longer it puts off doing it, and the more it tries to avoid reckoning with that responsibility, the worse the consequences will be. This goes for many other branches of government and human institutions that were also complicit in making the COVID hysteria worse than it needed to be.
That's just how the world works. That's how human society functions. And from my perspective I'm not seeing the left-leaning feminists who were largely responsible for creating the conditions in which this debacle could take place acknowledge that, and I truly don't believe they're going to be able to solve the problem until they acknowledge their role in making it. Call it a corporate confession, if you will. Confession comes before repentance, and repentance comes before reconciliation. There is no way around it.
I'm sorry you see that as mansplaining.
Duane: everyone has a stake in this, of course. But what I would counsel is that blaming any particular individual or group isn’t productive, and blaming women is particularly counterproductive. All of us are here in the trenches battling over this in our own ways. This is not a partisan issue, and there is no single prescriptive solution. It affects us all, and all of us need to pull together to right the ship, each in the way that makes most sense to us. I hope we can have agreement on that. But, if not, we shall each perseverance in our own ways, of that I have no doubt.
I almost stopped reading when Duane blamed feminists for all this. Real feminists (sorry, but I am a real feminist and am not trying to crow about it, it's just a fact) do not support what Duane seems to be claiming they do, they never did, including the brave and intelligent Kara Dansky. As heartfelt as his comment was trying to be, it revealed how little he really knows about feminism. It was an unintended insult to "left-leaning" women (and to some men), many of whom are leading the way in opposing the trans/queer/gender transition cult. And why does Duane focus on feminists as culprits, and not on so-called left-leaning men just as much? Does he realize that a lot of modern day young women who call themselves feminists are in essence just handmaidens of left-leaning men, and are not real feminists at all? Duane has so much to learn about what's really going on, because he actually seems pretty confused. I hope he makes an honest effort to do so. ....A last minute question: What does "right-wing" mean to a man like Duane? What does he think of the statement "The right thinks women [and I'll add children to that] are private property, while the left thinks women [and children] are public property"?
Could you answer this question first: What is a "real" feminist?
Cynthia, Kara has said she still identifies and votes as a Democrat. In some of her writings, Kara has also deflected blame for the rise of gender ideology away from the Left. That is what Duane is calling her out on. All that said, yes, Kara is speaking out very forcefully and impactfully in many respects. I appreciate the fact that she doesn't cede an inch to gender ideology, including pronoun usage. I feel like progress is being made, but tend to agree with Duane that substantive change won't happen until Democrats lose large numbers of voters and elections.
To all here: in this post, Kara has listed a number of wonderful things she and others, both as individuals and through organizations, have done to counter the scourge of gender ideology. One of the hopes I have from Kara opening up comments is for us all to be able to share what strategies any of us has used, in no matter how small a way, to join in this fight. It can be overwhelming, as the problem is so widespread and multi-faceted. I’ll put out a couple things I have tried, falteringly, but every now and then with a little success:
1) if I spot a concrete local issue, eg, right now there is a bill in my state assembly that would allow men to self-ID into women’s prisons, I write to the local official(s) to state my view. In this case, I got only acknowledgement of receipt from a staff person (v automated), but I have made a mental note to build on that as the occasion arises.
2) at least once each day that I spot something problematic (or good on the issue) in a news or opinion article, I write a comment to address it, and, if possible and appropriate, I write directly to the author of the article. It’s good to be aware that even online comments can make a difference: in some cases, the writer of the article actually reads them; in other cases, mere quantity can count. So, as one example, a young writer in a magazine to which I subscribe wrote a piece explaining why boycotting can be a good tool to bring about change. I know this to be true from working way back when for ACTWU v JP Stevens, but unfortunately, she chose a very bad example, which was boycotting the Harry Potter video games because, she claimed, Rowling is a transphobe filled with hate. I wrote to the editor in chief and explained (as politely as I could) that the problem here was Rowling isn’t in the least a transphobe, and recommended that the writer, and all of his staff, read Rowling’s own words on the subject. He did respond, and he wasn’t dismissive. It’s a small thing, but it’s a start, I do hope.
So, I don’t want to go on, but I hope some here might chime in with what you’ve tried, and how it went.
Susan - yes I totally love the fact that we can comment so that we can share strategies! Thank you for this! For myself, I have been so bottled up with frustration over all of this, that stumbling upon Kara’s substack is a godsend! I like your strategies and usually do the same. I think it’s very important that we speak out and not be afraid to speak our minds no matter how uncomfortable it can be. I also think that it is gathering together in different ways, whether through rallies or other types of gatherings that is essential. I have been thinking a lot about this and realize how effective this can be. Look at the stir that Rowling has brought about! The rage of all those women in Scotland brought about tremendous pushback! Being involved in a community like this and staying informed helps to keep us strong! I love some of the material that I have recently discovered on “Unherd” and “Quillette.”
Kara: first off, thank you so much for opening your Substack up to comments, and I hope all here will adhere to Kara’s guidelines to maintain constructive discussions. Second (really this is likely first), I am very, very grateful for your courageous advocacy.
I’d like to add, to Kara’s excellent list of those who have been speaking up so courageously, Lisa Selin Davis (who also has a Substack, and whose focus, as the mother of two affected girls, is what’s happening with young people). I have learned an enormous amount from her, including how to most effectively use my own small voice.
Finally, I want to encourage everyone here to speak up as you can, in ways that are comfortable for you, even in the smallest of ways. As the old mantra goes, “many hands make light work.” I have been amazed and surprised to discover how much little steps, with one person at a time, can add up to making a much bigger difference. If each of us just keeps chipping away in our own little corners of the world, collectively, we will get there, and we will win.
Thank you for this piece. It bears repeating, and this says what needs to be said.
Leftist radical feminist for 40 years here. I’ve lost friends over this and I have learned to be careful about talking about this so I don’t find my car or house or person being attacked in ways more harmful than just having my feelings hurt by people who drink the trans kool-aid.
WE ARE HERE.
We have been collecting news stories, creating databases, organizing, and we have been DOING THIS MOSTLY IN SECRET BECAUSE PEOPLE SILENCED US.
I had every single account (Twitter, Facebook, Medium, and many others) shut down because I hav e been an out and proud TERF for a decade, and know others who have been the radical feminists who educated me about this before I understood what was happening.
Now that the push back is being credited to the conservatives, a lot of us are cringing, not only at the “where are the feminists” but because it’s being flung about by people who historically despise us as much as the men who mock us by pretending to be us.
Where are we? We are there screaming and no one hears us. So, for the conservatives who spent a lifetime trying to push women back into the kitchen to do their husbands bidding, don’t ask me that or you will never hear the end of it.
Just because the world has no desire to hear us doesn’t mean we were not there risking our safety and well-being to defend our rights.
I guess our voices are too shrill and y’all just can’t hear us. Brand new day, same old drag.
Serious question: if "conservatives"--and particularly conservative men--had been willing to join in this fight with you, say, in 2015 or so, would you have accepted their help? Do you even accept it now?
Duane, we have discussed this for a long time. Many of us, maybe most of us, seem inclined to be grateful for conservatives showing up to slow this down and hopefully help stop it.
But you have to realize that it is hard to consider conservatives allies as they are themselves putting women and girls in harm’s way with their own religious agenda around other topics like abortion rights, which also very much deal with women being safe.
And of course the obvious gay rights platform as well, which is something all radical feminists support, and ironically we often supported gay rights when others did not, only to finally fully realize that gay men for the most part are either indifferent or actively dislike women and that things like drag and appropriating womanhood like it’s a tasteless joke is where all these people who scream about appropriation, blackface, and oppression seem to go deaf, dumb and blind.
So, while it is good that there is any group of people to show up and fight to stop this hideous, toxic, harmful runaway train, the fact that few conservatives seem to be acknowledging that it is radical feminists who HAVE been fighting, while losing jobs, businesses, and being shunned from their communities for it is just the same BS as it always was, people using OUR labor and the movement we already built to act like they are the ones doing the heavy lifting.
My friend, you are not the ones that have done the heavy lifting here.
I personally welcome you to stand against the medicalization and butchery of children and the removal of boundaries between women and the men who would harm us. But, please show some humility and realize that many of us are lesbians and we have a long history of having to fight like hell against conservatives just to be able to be openly who we are, and a lot of us are women like myself who have had to endure a lot of abusive, controlling behavior from conservatives who did not like women being in charge of themselves and their lives.
Also, be honest, are you taking up this fight because you want to stop the industry from reducing us all to commodifiable parts while simultaneously destroying women’s rights, or do you just have an axw to grind with “liberals” because they are telling you that you no longer have the right to indoctrinate your kids into your own toxic belief system, that is now their job?
Because radical feminists by and large despise gender roles. The whole pink and blue, dolls vs. trucks for toys, girls wear dresses and makeup and boys have short hair and pants, all that is just garbage. None of this is about God. It’s about preserving our humanity and stopping the machine from turning us into some life form they hold the patent on. Which also includes objectfying and sexualizing everyone for profit. The sex industry, something radical feminists also despise, has a huge hand in this trans ideology.
So tell me you also want to eradicate the porn industry and put in place the nordic model so only johns and pimps and traffickers are punished for selling sex, not the actual victims (those who get bought and sold) and maybe we find some solid common ground.
Or do you want women to remain as commodities but to get these queers out of power? Be honest. It matters to us.
Karen, you bring the fire, and I am here for it. Thank you!
First of all, I'm not a conservative. My question had nothing to do with religion or God.
Secondly, I'm "taking up this fight," so to speak, for A) my nieces and nephews, who are all in various phases of adolescence right now; B) because I recognize "gender dysphoria" (or however it's being called today) as a mental health issue, and as someone who was diagnosed with schizophrenia as a teenager and overcame that, I believe "affirmation" is the absolute worst thing that can be done to help someone suffering from such a problem; C) I do believe in certain "absolute truths" about the world, and the trans ideology is a lie, not truth.
Thirdly, you really assumed a lot about me from my asking you a simple question. Do you think I'm some sort of porn addict, or something? Why? Because I'm a man? If this is the way you treat someone who has a common interest with you, it's no wonder you're facing such an uphill battle. I've had problems even watching my niece get dressed up for her dancing, with all the stuff they put on and the outfits they wear. And these productions are almost entirely female-led.
At any rate, I can tell my presence isn't going to be welcome here, so I guess I'll leave.
Duane, no one assumed anything about you. You asked a question, and I answered from my perspective, which is based on having been a part of this fight for about a decade.
Do as you will, that is your choice.
You are welcome here, but if you cannot here a woman who happens to be a radical feminist speak truth, then just realize that this is at the heart of why this problem even exists. By and large men want to protect what they view as their own rights to have what they want while being unable to hear and understand why this often infringes on women’s rights.
No one accused you of being a porn addict, but your taking it there makes me think you have a problem with my pointing out that the porn industry is a huge part of this problem, and that the women/people who expose the connection between the “trans” movement and porn upset the people who want to tell themselves porn does no harm (but it totally does).
Trans ideology is a lie. We agree on that. And you should totally fight for the safety and well being of kids, whether or not they are related to you.
The bigger question is whether or not you or other people coming into this fight uphold the rights and boundaries of women? And why does it cause you such distress to have me point out what radical feminists are having to deal with as far as conservatives coming in to this fight, with us knowing they never supported women’s rights?
No one accused you of anything, my man. You came here with the question of whether or not you are welcome because you are a man I take it? And I responded that you are, but we are not entirely comfortable with people who show up late to this fight who may not support women’s rights. And you got angry. Which is what women are used to from men who don’t support our speaking openly about what is happening to us.
You personally stand to lose a lot less than any women or kids who are put at risk by “trans” ideologues (I say the word in quotes because it has no real definition or meaning). It may as well be labelled “mens sex based rights movement” because essentially that is what it is. Men lording their rights over women in all spaces and all contexts. A trans male will never be demanding anything from men and show on the other foot, if they did demand to be in men’s prisons or play on men’s sports teams they’d by and large get their asses handed to them. Cuz they are women.
No women are dressing as men and going out to hurt men. But the opposite is happening at an alarming rate and we are constantly gaslit by just everyone who supports the BS trans movement telling us that it never happens, even as we offer every instance of it happening as proof.
Women are the ones with a right to be furious, as we’ve been asking where people with common sense and a backbone are, and why everyone is avoiding truth in this. We are shocked, exhausted, and angry. And then we hear “where are the feminists!” What? You mean the people who were the ONLY ones fighting this and being shamed and fired and cancelled while everyone laughed about it or thought we were uptight bitches for not embracing men in makeup as women.
My saying this is not an indictment of YOU. It is an insight into what has been happening. And FYI, my response to your post was also a response to some others in general, asking where the feminists are. And there are conservatives following this movement now, and I want them to know that while I feel we all need to come together to stop this, I do grow concerned that many of them do not support women’s or gay rights.
I’ve long believed that if conservative, religious people show up to push back at this then women’s rifghts and gay rights get plowed under with it. It does not follow that I am labelling you as either of those things. As for being a porn addict, all I said is that this trans BS is heavily tied in with porn and feminists are anti porn because of how it affects us in a very real and harmful way. One pointed a finger at you. Why are you so defensive? It feels like you are looking for a fight.
I’m not. I’m saving my energy for the perverts in drag who are demanding to be called women.
Amazing comment, thank you!
Can you acknowledge the challenge of joining with "strange bedfellows" in fighting this issue? What does conservative mean to you, Duane, practically speaking, that is, in day to day life? What does real feminism mean and what has it meant, practically, that is, in day to day life? These are important and fundamental questions.
How about I ask you the same thing?
Can you acknowledge the challenge of joining with "strange bedfellows" that have spent decades demonizing you solely for your gender? I literally grew up being made fun of by "feminist" women because I'm a man. I was always assumed to have backwards views on everything. I had to sit through entire college courses where I was assured that I was basically the reason for all the world's problems.
I don't even consider myself a conservative (I don't consider myself a liberal, either). I honestly probably have more in common with you than I do with "conservative men." I don't hang out in conservative internet spaces, I don't watch conservative news, I don't follow conservative trends. I wanted to help build a bridge, but after one day it's clear that my presence isn't helping. I don't want to ruin Kara's comments section, so I'll leave.
(I do consider myself a solutions-oriented person, and the fact of the matter is, although this truth may make you uncomfortable, the Democrats ARE the political entity pushing the gender identity ideology, and they will continue to do so until they become convinced it's a losing issue. They are NOT convinced of that yet, and won't be until they see the result in election losses. I'm willing to bet that every "feminist" here has voted straight Democrat for all her adult life, so whether you want to admit it or not, you have enabled the rise of the trans movement. That may make you uncomfortable--good, it SHOULD make you uncomfortable. But it's the truth, whether it's a truth "feminists" want to accept or not.)
That's my message. Make of it what you will. I wish you well.
Good-bye.
A resounding "No" or "I don't really believe you" to just about everything in your comment. So good bye to you too, though I can't say I'll miss you. Good luck in your struggles.
Are you going to keep grinding your partisan axe here? Do you really think it helps this issue?
Thank you for your work Kara, and thank you for opening up comments.
My question: when did it become "radical" to demand basic rights for women?
This leads me to ask also if feminists describing themselves as "radical" is a politically useful meme. My gut instinct is that it is not.
I needed this review. Thanks.
There is just so much good writing about gender ideology, if only you know where to look. I think one of the confounding things with many friends who balk when I try to discuss this with them is that they look to public and media figures they trust on other issues as guides to this one. It’s a very hard thing to let go of that and truly think for yourself; you really have to fight against your own priors, and I don’t underestimate how hard that can be. I have been there myself, and there still remain lines I just won’t cross.
Lisa Selin Davis noted this today, when reflecting on an interview she recently did: “We need to stop discounting information just because of where it appears. When it comes to what's happening in gender clinics, to what's happening to families who haven't been given full information, who've been told science is settled when it's not—we need to put politics aside.”
This occasioned recalling a good friend who balked at reading something by Davis herself, as it appeared in the New York Post, but did so because he trusted my judgment about Davis. He was amazed at how rational the piece was, then went on his own search to discover other things Davis has written, no matter where they had appeared. He has never turned back, and I am beyond grateful to have him as an ally. With other friends, unfortunately, I have as yet had no luck. One friend has particularly high regard for Jon Stewart, who is calamitously wrong on these issues. When I gently tried to point out how, she clammed up, and the subject has been off limits since (though I try to keep our lines of communication friendly while looking for another opening).
I’d be interested to hear how others have dealt with this kind of thing, as I am sure so many of you have.
Susan, our media constantly refers to the fact that the AMA, APA, and the endocrinology society (forgot its name) support the use of puberty blockers and cross sex hormones and the whole “gender affirming” ideology. The fact is that these organizations have been captured by gender ideologues and trans activists (WPATH) and are not represented by science or medicine. Most people are not aware of this. The media point to erroneous and outdated studies such as the Dutch protocol which is not at all relevant to the present day dysphoric youths. The statistic about trans youths and suicide is also completely erroneous, and, I believe, based on a self survey related to the Trevor Project. So much of this misinformation has been fed to the general public. Many people swallow all of this In it’s entirety. It’s always helpful to show people the actual statistics around all of this. There are so many excellent sources and one that comes to mind Is Genspect? Not sure if I have spelled that correctly.
Margot: thanks for weighing in. Yes, Genspect is an excellent resource. What I am finding is that there is a need for a “breakthrough moment/opportunity” with each friend or neighbor with whom I try to engage before they begin to be receptive to learning about even tiny bits of of the massive excellent information that is available. Some breakthrough moments that offered opportunities to give additional information have been:
1) an alert (courtesy Kara and WDI) of the proposed changes to Title IX regulations
2) older women who follow sport who admire and listen to Martina Navratilova
3) older people who have trouble with the ungrammatical use of “they” as a singular pronoun
4) a blog post my better half did that included footage of the out of control folks who disrupted the Let Women Speak event in Manhattan, NY, which I then shared around
5) most recently, the changes to the Dahl children’s books
After that opening, if I am exceedingly lucky, baby steps, parceled out, not too much at a time, can help further things along. And then, one day, sometimes, the light totally dawns, and it is a beautiful thing. No more delicate educating needed, and an ally is born.
Here’s an example of that--from a person to whom I just sent “Affirmation Generation”:
I was wondering why I was sitting at the computer watching 90 minutes on a subject that didn’t directly affect me, and then I realized if I were watching PBS (when it was showing important stuff) I would absolutely watch this to the end.
I also appreciated the irony that when watching YT hysterical arguments on trans subjects I wondered why, instead of getting upset, they couldn’t reason together calmly. Then while watching all the calm presentations here my reaction was GETTING UPSET.
A writer friend from the 90s told me her mother (in Canada) had undergone prefrontal lobotomy. The friend was still outraged by it, though I forgot exactly how the mother’s life had been forever changed, for the worse.
This WAS very effectively done. I kept thinking of Extraordinary Popular Delusions and the Madness of Crowds. Not to mention the lobotomy craze and the opiod craze.
This should be required viewing for anyone in a position to affect medical and social policy. And as a member of society OF COURSE it affects me, no man is an island etc.
For those who may not be familiar with the writings of Jo Bartosch, I recommend her work. This piece, “It’s not ‘far right’ to question Drag Queen Story Hour: Parents’ legitimate safeguarding concerns are being dismissed as fascistic,” is typical of her sharp-witted, rye commentary.
https://www.spiked-online.com/2023/02/18/its-not-far-right-to-question-drag-queen-story-hour/
Here’s a quote: “In truth, the growth of drag events for children is an indictment of the mainstream. What possible good did Tate Britain think it was doing by hosting a Drag Queen Story Hour? And why are so many libraries and schools so keen to put on these trans-activist events for children? This has left an open, child-safeguarding-shaped hole for more extreme groups to step through.”
While Bartosch is writing in the UK about events there, I am sure many of us have seen this and things akin to it happen wherever we live. One little thing I do when I see cultural institutions of which I am a member kowtow to gender ideology/self ID is to write to them, or if sent a member survey, take on any questions that show gender ideology at work. (In a recent example, I objected to the Morgan Library putting on an Eddie Izzard “one woman show.”
I would be interested to hear from anyone here what, if anything, you try to do when encountering things like this.
Yes yes, Susan, I know what you mean about the "breakthrough moment." I also find that many women simply do not realize the totality of the problem, as they are busy living their lives, working, etc. For those of us who are really involved and informed, there is that realization. I do think the Title IX change possibility, if understood, is a huge wake up call. People have not been paying attention, and perhaps now they are. I find some of the Youtube info very helpful - there are several women who are speaking out about this and the long-term danger of transition.
I think, too, that since we live in the West, we are, of course, very open to civil and human rights, as we should be. This ideology has hijacked citizens' desire to be open to all lifestyles, etc. And of course most of us want people to live as their authentic selves. This also leaves open to these types of delusional ideologies, and many people are reluctant to speak up for fear of being accused of being some sort of "phobe."
As time goes on, this will eventually settle. Sadly, there will be so much human destruction in its path, with many, many young people irreparably harmed. We must persevere, and we will!
Thanks for mentioning "Extraordinary Popular Delusions." I was not familiar with that!
Thank you, Kara, for all that you are doing to combat this nonsensical, yet insidious, gender ideology. I have been following you since your first appearance on Hannity. I think it matters little which side of the political aisle one is on when it comes to all of this. Though I must confess that I do favor some of what Duane has said, we must pull ourselves together and stand up for what is not only right, but logical and real in every sense.
I have read a good deal about the history of this ridiculous ideology and have been following (quite obsessively), all news gender-related, including Riley Gaines’ fight for womens’ sports to Nicola Sturgeon’s merciful resignation!
I have always stood for womens’ rights but have not necessarily defined myself as a feminist so much as a “rugged individualist.” Now is the time, though, for strong women to step up and redefine ourselves. We must appeal to the young generation. We must bring back the legacy and truths of our mothers and grandmothers who, regardless of political persuasion, understood the meaning of womanhood. And I am very optimistic that this is happening.
I am disheartened, though, that this terrible conflict is so defined by politics - not at all surprised of course. We have come to be so wed to our left or right leaning persuasions that’s nothing else matters. This is why it’s such a HUGE big deal that Jamie Reed has blown the whistle on what’s happening in the Missouri gender clinic. I am sure that such things are happened everywhere that these clinics exist. The sad legacy, what I refer to as the “Lupron legacy” will surely leave a terrible blight on our time, one in which countless children, and adults too, will have been permanently harmed.
Finally, I want to say “spread the word!” All of us - men and women - will make good things happen and halt the march of gender ideology if we stay strong! And, I’m grateful for having discovered WoLF through Kara, an organization that I have recently started to contribute to.
Great updates from Kara to this piece!
Dear Ms Dansky: I'm hoping you can help me. I'm running for school board in my Minnesota town. I'm also a former lifelong Democrat because of their betrayal of women and girls, and I decided to run for school board to fight to get gender ideology out of our schools. One of the opposing candidates has denounced me for my "extrem views" and for having spoken "during public comment at the Feb., 2022 School board meeting, where [Iris - that's me] falsely accused our schools of indoctrinating students with gender ideology. She used inflammatory language like “high priests of the Church of Trans.” I want to state that I strongly disagree with these unfounded claims. I find this kind of negative rhetoric really harmful to our community, to our school community."
I have a radio interview tomorrow in which I'll respond to her. As you know, Minnesota is a "trans refuge" state, but I'm finding it difficult to glean bare-bones information about exactly HOW OLD a kid can be to get "gender affirming care" with or without parents' consent. The law says over 18, but there is a broad exception to this: "Minor who is living apart from parents and managing own financial affairs" and "emergency treatment" (if "gender-affirming care" is "life-saving treatment" it can surely be interpreted by the TRAliban MN state authorities to be "emergency treatment." I just want to be able to say straight in language that everyone understands what the facts are – can my 14-year-old get "gender-affirming care" (including surgery) without my consent? "
Thank you so much for all your hard work.
The Hill: "In April 2023, Walz signed a bill into law giving Minnesota courts the ability to make initial custody determinations in cases where “the presence of a child in [the] state is for the purpose of obtaining gender-affirming health care,” and temporary emergency jurisdiction in cases where a child present in the state “has been unable to obtain gender-affirming health care.” This so-called “gender-affirming care” can include puberty blockers, opposite-sex hormones and other interventions. So the effect of this law is that Minnesota courts have the power to remove children from their own parents’ custody if the parents (inside or outside of Minnesota) wish to protect their children from harmful hormones or surgeries."
https://www.house.mn.gov/hrd/pubs/ss/ssminorhc.pdf
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